So how do you know that it is time to lose weight? Other than the obvious being when you sit in a plastic chair and stand up the chair gets stuck on your butt. While that is a great reason, it isn't mine. Mine involves more complex reasons. Like my toddler's new favorite toy is mommy's tummy. This isn't funny people. Just confirms the fact that a tummy tuck is in my immediate future. So I am lying on the floor, I had been playing with Jackson when something on t.v. caught my eye. Probably the new cutting machine on the infomercials.. that thing looks amazing. I don't have any need to cut things with a perfectly straight line or corrugated edge, but still...why would you want to go through life without one of those. Might get it as a just in case.. Just in case I need to put a perforated edge of something.
So anyways I am lying on the floor. When Jackson comes up and jumps on my stomach. He then lifts up my shirt and stares. I thought it was my belly button that he was fascinated with or perhaps he was gloating in the success of all the stretch marks he left. Like he was proud of the mark he left. But nope it was the whole package. He poked down at my belly button and then at the area around it. He was amazed. He proceeded to poke and prod at the fleshiness(which he caused by the way) and began to laugh.
This my friends, was the low point of my post-Jackson days. My stomach already went through the turmoil of going from a nice flat muscular tummy to a rather large pregnant belly to what it is now, nothing but inflated skin. This is where the term flabolanche comes from.
I know that it is a work in progress. I know I had a baby(ummm 14 months ago) I know in my heart that it will one day be that tight little number it was 23 months ago. But for the mean time I would like to keep it out of Jack's sight. I will keep the flabolanche at bay so Jackson wont wanna play...
On a side note: That is NOT me up there!! Google it if you dont believe me
6 comments:
PLEASE tell me that isn't really you in that picture.. not that it is horrible, but the thought of my niece showing her bra & underwear on the internet kinda creeps me out.
By the way, I know a great plastice surgeon, but you could never afford it.. anyway it would be stupid to do it now.. what if you have more children? Then you would have spent thousands of dollars for nothing.
Also, you know my view on elective surgery when you have kids....
Oh my Lordy. Sadly, I know just what you're going through...
sorry- the deleted one is me.
sad- i hate to admit tyler does this to me, too... it started with my big pregnant belly, but he quickly moved on to my thighs, boobs, anything chunky. he doesn't do it to rob. :(
"So anyways I am lying on the floor. When Jackson comes up and jumps on my stomach. He then lifts up my shirt and stares. I thought it was my belly button that he was fascinated with or perhaps he was gloating in the success of all the stretch marks he left. Like he was proud of the mark he left. But nope it was the whole package. He poked down at my belly button and then at the area around it. He was amazed. He proceeded to poke and prod at the fleshiness(which he caused by the way) and began to laugh. "
LMAO! Lorelai did the same thing to me a couple weeks ago. I should have been mortified but I couldent stop cracking up with her. Eh Mommys flab is entertaining hahaha!
haha Maegan.. I know the feeling sweetie
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