Taking A Bite Out of Jack

My mom and I picked up Jackson from daycare yesterday. She had to go with me because I cant lift him for a couple days due to the biopsy. Well as the teacher was handing me his daily report sheet she informed us that a little girl had bitten Jackson and blah blah blah...he did something..blah blah blah. Um....Excuse me, did she just say someone bit my son?

I mean I know he is kinds of yummy because I nibble his toes on a daily basis...but some snotty nosed little punk actual sunk her teeth in my son's left arm. Ok, so that is a little extreme. She is a cutie but still! Keep your chompers in yo mouth! She actually broke the skin on his arm. I am sure this will not be the last time that something like this happens. I hope that my kid is never the biter though. How embarassing is that for the mom? Trying to explain that your kid bites..they should have to wear onesies that say, "Caution I bite" to give our innocent ones a head up.

The best part in this whole fiasco, it the teacher had the nerve to say that Jackson provoked it. Not...my innocent liwtle biwty Jacki. She said that he pulled her hair, so the little girl in turn bit him. Umm....what if the teacher didnt see what really happened. What if the little girl came up to Jack and shook her tiny toddler booty at him and he didnt like it so then he pulled her hair...or what if she came up to him and slapped him and so he pulled her hair.. or what if....

I guess the options are endless...and since they are only toddlers I know they are still dabbling in what is right and what is wrong.. so I will let this one slide, this one time! But I still think that mom should give her kid a mouthgaurd!

Biopsy Wednesdays

Today was the day of the biopsy. I was a bunch of nerves this morning. So much so that I had the shakes. I even passed up getting a Starbucks on the way to the hospital for fear that it might cause some gastro-issues during the procedure...if you know what I mean...

I had to be at the hospital at 8 am. My mom and I arrived at around 8:15. We got to the hospital and immediately got lost. Although as we were walking down the halls I realized that it wasn't like Grey's Anatomy at all. No McDreamy's or McSteamy's...nothing. Only a little old lady who was an obvious volunteer, whom shuffled us in the right direction.

I got back to the room and they took all my statistic stuff down and made me change into a not so fashionable robe. They even gave me some hospital bracelets..this was getting downright fancy. They explained the procedure to my mom and I, then after a quick couple minutes to gather my thoughts, they walked me down to the room. It was like a walk of doom. Like I was going to be sacrificed to the boob biopsy gods. The cute little nurse who resembled Sally Field, ushered my mom to the waiting room then guided me to the biopsy room. She really was nice as can be, her name was Amy, I guess you cant go wrong with a person named Amy. I think if her name had been Hilda I would have been a little more scared.

Amy got me prepped for my ultrasound and the technician took a look at the mass in my right breast. She said it didn't look "cyst like" and said that it was more of a mass. This meant that I wasn't getting a fine needle aspiration, but rather a REAL biopsy. yikes. I started crying because I was so nervous!

After the ultrasound, the doctor came in and prepped me for the biopsy. Now this time I really felt like I was on Grey's, the doctor had a distinct resemblance to Addison! I promise.. even though she left to Private Practice..

Amy held my hand and talked to me about Jackson throughout the entire procedure. The only part that truly hurt was after the biopsy was over and they needed to place a metal marker by the mass. The doctor said the tissue samples all looked good and benign, but she isn't a pathologist so she couldn't be 100% correct.

I am now sitting here with a bandaged up boob and new worries of my results. I think this will be the hardest part...waiting.

Float Like A Butterfly, Sting Like A Bee

It is a beautiful Saturday. The sun is shining and there isn't a cloud in the sky. The weather is a perfect 70 degrees outside. Upon waking up this morning we had our typical weekend breakfast of breakfast tacos. That is a whole other post. Gosh I LOVE breakfast tacos...and so does my ass.

Then I purchased the Chris Rock tickets that I am getting Andrew for Valentines Day. $155 later...we sat around while I finished up some homework assignments, fed Jackson his first Popsicle and then Andrew left to go home.

I decided my son was a bit on the stinky side and realized that he hasn't had a bath since Tuesday!! Bad Mommy! So after a quick macaroni chow fest I stripped him naked..let him run around then threw him in the bathtub. You could tell by his facial expressions that he was living the dream in the big garden tub of his. He especially LOVES to pull the drain out. I am trying to get him to realize that once he pulls that up that the water drains, or goes "bye, bye". He doesn't get it, so I end up getting my rolling up my jeans and getting my own feet wet, in order to keep the drain plugged.

After the bath I towel him off and apply the lotion that smells SOOOOO good! We get dressed then I decided, "Hey! Its a beautiful day...lets get this kid some exercise...and sun". We went out into the backyard and kicked a ball around and threw leaves up in the air...It was great. He then stuck his hands in some wet bird poop, a sign of things to come.

I decided to be a great mommy today and take my son for a walk in his beloved wagon. We got all situated and headed out to the front. We were just taking a brisk walk down the block. We were rounding the corner and I decided to take him to the park which was less than a block down the street. We were running, laughing...it looked straight out of a movie I am sure. I took a deep breath and thought to myself, Life is Good....

THEN BAM!!!!! I got slapped back into reality when a wasp or bee or something stingalicious came and stung me on the back of my arm!! I freaked out, I must have looked like I was having an epileptic seizure to all the neighbors. I never saw the culprit but he definitely left his mark. I quickly turned that wagon around when Jack started crying, I yelled, "suck it up buttercup!" then ran back home.

But I know he only stung me because I must have smelled like the biggest flower buffet he ever smelled. Damn Victoria Secret lotion.

Work Out Blues

What does one do when they are pounded with loads of homework and is having the biggest writers block and the worst case of ADD? umm.. get up and go to Sonic for a chocolate milkshake in 40 degree weather, OF COURSE!

I only got a milkshake to enhance my lovely lady lump(y) figure.

But honestly, WHY don't I have the motivation to lose weight? I really really want to have the body I had when I was 16, I do! and I know every step that I need to make to reach that goal. But its that first step that is so hard. I know that I am the type that needs to go to the gym in order to get the right kind of workout.

I don't believe in exercise videos. I just cant do them. I feel silly getting all my work out gear on and getting down in my living room. It is exceptionally hard to get my work out on when there is a huge shiny fridge in my peripheral vision. I usually end up pausing the video when I am out of breathe and head towards the fridge or the pantry. How awful is that?

At least my jaw is getting a work out.

Know A Good Plastic Surgeon?

So how do you know that it is time to lose weight? Other than the obvious being when you sit in a plastic chair and stand up the chair gets stuck on your butt. While that is a great reason, it isn't mine. Mine involves more complex reasons. Like my toddler's new favorite toy is mommy's tummy. This isn't funny people. Just confirms the fact that a tummy tuck is in my immediate future.

So I am lying on the floor, I had been playing with Jackson when something on t.v. caught my eye. Probably the new cutting machine on the infomercials.. that thing looks amazing. I don't have any need to cut things with a perfectly straight line or corrugated edge, but still...why would you want to go through life without one of those. Might get it as a just in case.. Just in case I need to put a perforated edge of something.

So anyways I am lying on the floor. When Jackson comes up and jumps on my stomach. He then lifts up my shirt and stares. I thought it was my belly button that he was fascinated with or perhaps he was gloating in the success of all the stretch marks he left. Like he was proud of the mark he left. But nope it was the whole package. He poked down at my belly button and then at the area around it. He was amazed. He proceeded to poke and prod at the fleshiness(which he caused by the way) and began to laugh.

This my friends, was the low point of my post-Jackson days. My stomach already went through the turmoil of going from a nice flat muscular tummy to a rather large pregnant belly to what it is now, nothing but inflated skin. This is where the term flabolanche comes from.

I know that it is a work in progress. I know I had a baby(ummm 14 months ago) I know in my heart that it will one day be that tight little number it was 23 months ago. But for the mean time I would like to keep it out of Jack's sight. I will keep the flabolanche at bay so Jackson wont wanna play...

On a side note: That is NOT me up there!! Google it if you dont believe me

It has been a rough couple of days, compounded with the stress I already have....I will be back from my blog hiatus in a day perhaps.

On A Lighter Note

After my very somber sounding post from Tuesday, I wanted to follow up with some some cute pictures that will give you the warm fuzzies and an incredibly hilarious video that had me in hysteria for a good 15 minutes. Which doesn't sound long but honestly, imagine laughing uncontrollably for 15 minutes. I got my major ab workout for the day.

Pet Mouse Vs. Hawk

And here are the warm fuzzies I could find:

Added Stress

Anyone who knows me personally, can completely agree with the fact that my middle name is hypochondriac. I am one so much so that I believe I even wrote a blog about it in the past. Well anyways... add stress to that situation and you have one frazzled woman.

I just started school this week. I am taking 15 hours. Which seems like a lot to begin with...plus taking care of my 14 month old, its going to be exciting to say the least. I dread that I will have no me time ever and will push away those closest to me in the effort to get things done.

Well I just received some not so good news from my doctor. I had a lump in one of my breasts and it turns out they would like to do further testing. By the looks of the mammogram pictures it looks like a benign solid mass, but they need to perform a biopsy to rule out everything. Nice. So if you can only imagine the things going through my hypochondriac brain of mine. It goes from being poked in the boob by a monster needle to a picture of me with no hair due to chemotherapy. I am not trying to make that a joking image..I am serious people this is what my brain synapses automatically associate biopsies too.

I really wish there was a magic cancer pill that solved every one's problems. I am not saying I have cancer but honestly its a 50-50 chance right? And that my friends is some scary shit. I have always wanted a boob job so I figure opting for the double mastectomy and getting fake ones put in..doesn't sound like that bad of an option.

I guess it is WAY to early to be thinking along these lines. I still have 15 hours of school and my 14 month old to worry about. Until then I am going to try my darnest to put those awful thoughts and biopsy jitters behind me because honestly there isn't any room left in me for them to stay.

U.B. Syndrome

Which stands for Ugly Baby Syndrome. Come on now, I am not being a total heartless bitch. You know damn well that you have been down that road before. Whenever my friends and I see and ugly baby we say, "wow...gotta case of the U.B.s" Sounds very Mean Girls huh? But honestly. What do you do or what do you say?

Out of all the babies I know there are a couple and I mean maybe 2 or 3 that I would say got slapped with the U.B. stick. Don't worry my Internet mama's I will PROMISE that not one of your kiddos falls into that group. Both of these babies I know in real life. I can't help it.

While I was pregnant I made my best friend vow to me that she would be 100% honest when it came to Jack's looks. If there is anyone I know I can trust Val to speaketh the truth. Thankfully she told me she is afraid to have kids because she doesn't think she can produce anything cuter than Jack. Which my answer to her was..you are damn right you cant! It takes talent to pop out a kid with a face like that.

But we all know that every mother thinks that their child is the cutest. But I wonder what the mother of U.B.s think. And what do you say to the mother of U.B.s about their little ones? "Aww they are so.....intelligent. Brains is better than beauty." I wonder if they know they have a U.B. and are just in denial. I dunno... I guess it is something I will never know the true answer to. That's because my child is a part of the W.T.A.A.C.B. group, aka. Wow that's an amazingly cute baby! group.

Eye in the Sky

As I have mentioned before, Jackson started daycare this week. It has been good so far. It truly is a great daycare, it really better be and I wish they put gold nuggets in Jack's pockets each day for the price it costs us weekly to keep him there. BUT they don't. They do however offer a very spiffy video camera option that allows you to monitor your child throughout the day. It is pretty awesome. But it definitely comes with its cons.

I think its great that I have the opportunity to watch my son while he is in the care of these teachers I barely know. BUT I just didn't get much done today. Instead I stayed home and watched my son on the computer all day. Really the only times I got up was when they were outside of the room. It was really addicting.

Up to 3 people at a time are allowed to watch the toddler show. This means my mom was watching while she was at work. My grandmother who is retired was watching and of course me. He is truly loved if you couldn't tell before.

While it is about a 10 on the awesome scale, being able to monitor him, it also conjured up a bunch of mommy emotions I didn't think could penetrate my rock of an attitude. Watching my little man sit all by himself, staring at the door like he was waiting for me to come and rescue him was NOT so much fun. At one point I was balling watching him. I usually pick up my little man at around 3:30-4 but not today. I couldn't stand just sitting here watching him wobble across the room. So I picked him up and hour and a half earlier.

As soon as I got in the car I got a call from my mom, my grandmother and my aunt. Apparently they all saw me on the camera pick him up and were relieved that I did so. So who exactly is this daycare thing harder on? Obviously the above mentioned...

Hello My Name is Maegan and I am Addicted to....

Seriously what did we Americans do before the creation of Reality T.V. I mean seriously. Thank goodness it doesn't take too creative of minds to create these shows because then what would we watch? Especially now that this stupid writers strike is going on. Which I am completely pissed about, but that's another topic.

So tonight's lineup included some good shows; Crowned:The Mother of all Pageant Shows, Wife-Swap, Super Nanny and my personal favorite Project Runway. 3 out of 4 of those shows are pretty lame but it was either that or another episode of Seinfeld or Everybody Loves Raymond. Come on people..I have had enough of those two shows to last me a lifetime!!! I can only laugh at the puffy shirt so many times.

But really... think back. What did we do before Reality T.V.? What did we watch?

Oh yeah...we spent quality time with the people we love....that's what we did. Or we filled our minds with more substantial things that will better us as individuals. That made us smart Americans and thus furthering our knowledge on social and economical problems. This gave us more profound subjects to converse about with one another.

But no... we would much rather talk about the Heidi and Lauren war(btw..totally Team Lauren) or who was auf'ed on Project Runway(Why didn't they kick that crybaby Ricky off?!?) I am somewhat ashamed to admit that I am a Reality T.V. junkie. It is truly an addiction and if they took a t.v. away from me I would have to hawk my personal assets, maybe even my son, to the corner pawn shop to get myself another one. You would then find me in the corner of a dark room with only the t.v, where I would be watching the reality t.v. channel. Yes there is an entire channel devoted to this junk. And for those who just love to burst bubbles...it isnt scripted, NOT EVEN THE HILLS.

Daycare is Awesome

So its the dawn of a new age. No not Aquarius..but rather Jackson started daycare. I really had mixed emotions about putting him in there. But it needed to be done. I am putting myself through a rigorous schedule of education and work ethics. It is going to be the longest couple of weeks, EVER.

But I will be 15 hours closer to my bachelors degree. Nice.

But Jackson being in daycare is a good thing. My son hasn't been on a schedule since we were in the hospital the couple days after he was born. Not only is he in need of a routine but he is also in dire need of some kid-on-kid playtime.

This daycare is awesome. They have art and music times. They take them outside. They feed him and change his diapers regularly. They even give me a log sheet when I pick him up, of all the things they did that day, i.e. feeding, diapers, etc. Its awesome.

I think it will be great for Jackson. You have to know my kid he is ...very, um whats the word...dependent on his mom. That would be me. He needs to be carried at all time and even needs to be rocked to sleep still. Its a little on the ridiculous side. But that's my kid and I love him.

Resolutions...Out the Window.

So.. I had decided back in 2007 that I would follow my resolutions for real this time. I was going to cut out sodas and stop eating so excessively...and stop eating crap. Well, not so much. I haven't done a thing I set out to do.

I don't drink that many sodas to begin with since my mom only buys herself soda here at the house. She likes to drink Diet Dr. Pepper. I would rather drink chilled elephant piss. It probably tastes the same. So whenever I do get to drink soda it is out of someone else's glass.

As far as food goes, well I failed miserably at that feat. I have had the greasiest and cheesiest things to eat lately. The other day my grandma took us all to a local hamburger joint here in San Antonio. It's called Chris Madrid's. I am not a big hamburger eater but I will eat this beef any day.

I have been eating so much lately that I have contemplated starting another blog about losing weight and then another blog about all the good things there are to eat in San Antonio. Because seriously.. we aren't the 2nd fattest city in America for nothing!

Ever since pregnancy and even more recently, I have been on a quest to find the perfect chicken salad sandwich. I just HAVE to try it at every restaurant that offers it. It is strange. But delish.

Ok...so here I am ranting and raving about food. When I should have visions of treadmills and rice cakes dancing in my head.

But considering that I am devouring everything in sight, I did get asked if I was losing weight. So that's a plus! I must be doing something right... come to think of it, pass me that big piece of chicken!

Enticed by the Red Bullseye

It has really been a struggle to come up with something to write on here and I am still not sure I have anything substantial to say. I have been sick since New Years Eve and am just now feeling somewhat better. Other than feeling completely run down, I am great!

Even though I am VERY sick I still have a toddler to take care of so I had to suck it up buttercup. Waking up at 7:30 am by my son's foot, accompanied by a pounding headache has been a blast! I am glad New Years took off without a hitch.

So today I got away for about 20 minutes because I had to go get some things from the grocery store. I was driving down the road and came to a huge crossroad. To my right was the major grocery store, H-E-B, for those who live in TX and to my left, Super Target. Each store had the items I needed...but one lacked a shoe department and clothes. No brainer right? I took a left and headed for Tarje. (That is said with a french accent)

Now people, I went in for two items. Orange juice and some OTC medicine. But I had to stop by the purses, clothes, shoes (I need new flats) and then finally made my way over to the grocery section. I ended up buying what I needed and also picked up a cute little Cars backpack for Jackson. All in all I spent $40 at Target on 4 different items.. I am still dumbfounded.

But hey my kid will be the only 13 month old rockin a Cars backpack, come Monday!

Little Baby Houdinis

My sneaky little offspring has mastered the art of escaping. This morning I had him in the living room with with the gate closed tight, like usual, as I got some things together in the kitchen. Don't think I leave my kid in a room by himself..the two rooms are right next to each other. I figured he was playing with his toys or turning on and off the t.v. because he was very quiet. Extra quiet.

I peeked over the bar to check on him and he was playing with the baby gate. He does this some of the times but never gets far so I didn't worry too much. I went back to work..checking my email and myspace, you know the important stuff. When I hear him crying...well screaming kinda.

I ran into the living room and he was in between the baby gate and the wall. I couldn't help but laugh. He looked half helpless half hilarious. I couldn't believe the little stinker was going Houdini on my ass and escaping the gate! I quickly grabbed my camera and turned around but by the time I turned it on and focused in on him it was too late. He was already in the hallway, halfway to the front door.

I looked at him and asked where he was going, he just looked at me and said, "Bye!" I got a mild case of empty nest syndrome and then took off after him because he zoomed past the front door and quickly went up the stairs..saying, "Bye!" all the way up. He is pretty clever for a 13 month old. Clever than most I think. Who knows though.. I am just saying that because he is my 13 month old. But whether he is the smartest or not, he is the cutest. And that is a fact!